"You're a racist shit"

So had an interesting week. Thursday night was spent on sushi with Jackie, Dhimal and Vatsal to celebrate the passing of SOA exams. Hit up Caesar's afterwards, minus the three aforementioned, but attending were James, Colin, Amanda, and the Singaporean guys. Number-closed a cute Greek Laurier girl (and I don't mean a sorority sister); she says we should do coffee, respond sure, but don't flake out on me! Quick hug and bounce before the two cockblocks could return and do damage.

Friday was spent at a KCF meeting repenting for my sins. Now this despite that I am neither Korean... nor Christian. I went there at the behest of Sophie and Marty, who coaxed me to come out at Clubs day. So I did. About 20 ppl came out, and there were Chinese guys and a Viet guy and even a white guy, so I wasn't too much of an outcast. We sit in a circle, Marty and his buddy start quoting verses from Corinthian and stuff, get into a discussion about group harmony, God's Truth etc. Deep stuff... These East Asians don't really open up, but being brown, debating is like mental masturbation for me... well bad analogy considering the subject matter, but you get the drift. Marty actually seemed to take a real liking to me, asked me afterwards to come to some smaller Bible discussion seminars (preach to the heathen right?). I say sure why not.

Went back to my sinful ways on Saturday. Original plan was Turret, but that collapsed because we had Brock Campbell and some of his roommate's friends from TO coming. So went back to the old watering hole where everbody-knows-your-name: The Bomber.

I had way too much hard-liquor pre-drinking, so I am kinda at the point of stupid-drunk. Paid the price. I am still feeling the residual effects as I write this in fact. Interesting times nonetheless.

So at one point we are leaning against a table by the door that leads to the patio. See an Asian girl sorta dancing alone. Make eye contact. Motion for her to come over. She comes. Awesome, got her in my frame. Convo paraphrased (YT = yours truly):

YT: Quick question. Asian girls. White guys. What's the deal?
AG: They're bigger.
YT: OK you know what, that doesn't make sense to me. I see that as an expression of self-hatred. Thousands of years of evolution says that you should be more attracted to your own kind!
AG: I don't want to talk about this. (wanders away)
YT: Sorry I'm not white enough for you! (Bounce over to the bar with wing)

Anyhow, I am kinda out of my element, and I've had one too many Red Bulls so I'm like to my wingman "You know what, screw opening sets. Let's dance!" He nods in accordance.

Dance floor dynamics are interesting to observe. You see a lot of crop circles. You see a lot of wallflowers. Well we head over like we own the joint and penetrate one of the circles, and we're really rocking it on with these three fairly foxy brown girls for a good 3-4 songs. I'm having a pretty good drunken time. Then I see some brown/possibly Persian-looking girl in a red tube-top step down from the podium and come barreling towards me, head on. She looks mean.

BG: I heard what you said to my friend.
YT: Huh?
BG: Over there. You told her to go suck on some white cock.
YT: Excuse me?

(Now I may or may not have said this... I don't recall. It may have been something I told my wing in private, and she may have happened to overhear. I guess this is kinda like Jimmy Hoffa's body... it'll never be resolved.)

BG: You're a racist shit.
YT: What? Excuse me, but your friend made a blanket generalization about all Asian guys. Like my buddy over here.... Now I haven't seen his member, but I can assure you that it does not conform to the stereotype. Well that's what the girls he's been with tell me ;)
BG: *dirty look*
YT: You know, I can feel the sexual tension between us now.
BG: *Storms out*

Well that's it in a nutshell, or at least what I can remember. I think the actual verbal chew-out was a good 10 min. In the middle of the dance floor. I wonder what other people were thinking. Note to self: never engage in a logical argument with chicks - especially while inebriated. Guys have a need to make sense (Chris Rock, Never Scared, 02:15). You'll never win.

Anyhow, as I'm leaving, I see the original Asian girl; she's sitting with a friend in one of the couches by Turnkey. Head over with my buddy. Attempt to call a truce.

YT: Hey, no hard feelings.
AG: How can you say that?
YT: Hey what's your name? I'll add you to Facebook. (Smiles)
AG: *Shakes head* I don't feel comfortable giving you that information.
Fr: Do you want me to call the police on you? (A UW copper is in the vicinity - now these guys strut around in impressive uniforms, but they have no real power).
YT: (Ignoring Friend.) Never mind her, she's probably a tight-ass, she's brown. I know her type very well. But you know what? Ultimately, why does it matter to you so much? Who cares what some random drunk guy in a club says. Don't let it get to you.

AG still looks visibly upset. I guess the convo got a bit loud/heated, because at this point the UW copper comes over. Asks what's the matter.

YT: Alright I'm gonna bounce. *wave* Have a nice life!

AG is still glaring at me.

Aww... UW girls. So pretentious. Is it the cachet of going to a prestigious school? There are only two really world-renowned faculties: Engineeering and Math, and one can rest assured that 95% of girls at The Bomber don't fall into either camp. So honestly, get off the high-horse. You don't see this with Laurier girls, like Jessica and Dina and Melissa... I surmise that it's because they're surrounded by nice-guy chumps, so when a guy dares to say something so abrasive (and I may or may not have said this), it totally knocks them off their pedestal. Especially coming from a guy who looks relatively harmless and non-threatening. Big fish in a small pond, but they sure can't swim with the sharks!

I need a confessional with Marty.